Merry Xmas and a Happy New Year
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@mokey said in Merry Xmas:
May your extended family time be as short as you wish, with enough booze and quality T & A pics to get you through. Be safe, and don't fucking drink and drive.
Yes. Fuck yes. I'm the one who will be picking up and dropping off the MIL with dementia from her residential care. Therefore the piss-hitting cannot start in earnest until I get home.
MIL was fixated on having a sleepover at our place - because she hates the brand-new residential place she's got, which is better than her house, or staying at her Dad's shambles of a place. This was last week:
Day 1 convo:
Mrs TA: "Nick's brother is staying for a few weeks* so the spare room is occupied"
MIL: "Oh. But what about on the couch?"
Mrs TA: "You just had a knee replacement, and the couch is not going to help that"
MIL: "Oh."*Narrator: He was only staying five days.
Day 3 convo:
MIL: "So Christmas night is definitely out?"
Mrs TA: "Yes. As I said, Nick's brother is in town and has the spare room"
MIL: "But I can just stay on the couch or the floor or th-"
Mrs TA: "You just had surgery so you c-"
MIL: "One night won't hurt!"
Mrs TA: [thinking quickly] "We're going over to [friend's place] that night anyway!"
MIL: "So... Christmas night is definitely out?"Dementia. Its pretty fucked. Mainly we're not having her because shoehorning her out of our place after lunch is going to be difficult enough.
Besides that, we'll be seeing people we want to hang out with on Boxing Day at their place. Tradition.
Have officially informed Mrs TA that I'm lowering my expectations of the day being a raging success. Her catering will, of course, be to the highest degree. The personnel attending will not.
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2016 was a tough old year for me, tossing away a comfortable life in Dunedin because I was constantly reminded of an ex-girlfriend everywhere I went in Dunners. So, for someone who planned to the nth degree, it was a bold move to up sticks and leave with no plan.
After a couple of months of drifting aimlessly (albeit with accommodation support from parents and some contract work I can do anywhere), I've ended up with full-time work in a completely different (and interesting) industry. What's more, it's Monday to Friday and (generally) 8-5pm...
So 2017 has delivered more than I might have expected this time last year. And I'm currently having a single malt out of Dad's cupboard so no complaints here.
Meanwhile, I'm figuring out what to actually do with a summer holiday...
To the rest of you, enjoy the time with whoever you're spending it with.
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Merry Christmas ferners. Hope you get to spend quality time with whanau and friends.
A shout out to all the emergency service workers on duty tomorrow. And let's not forget the immigrants working the 7-11 counters that allow us to grab that last minute gift card or box of chocolates.
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Yes Merry Christmas to one and all on TSF. Over here we are still waiting for Sowan's Nicht, at which time I will be raising a glass of single malt Scottish Wine and feasting on dry oats as a token gesture to the wannabe Scotsman and of course to @Talisker
Here's to a great 2018
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13 years. Ive been registered here for 13 years, not to mention the couple years lurking before that. I hate to say it but you lot are actually a pretty damn significant relationship...Merry christmas to all, its been a hell of a year, not particularly awesome, not particularly shit, bit of a new start and never a dull moment. I hope everyone has a safe and enjoyable holiday period and is back with a bit of banter in the new year. Massive thanks to all the admins that keep this fine place in order and the techies that keep us running (kirwan & bartman?). I've had a few beersies, about to crash for all of about 5 hours where I expect a wake up call in the shape of nieces and nephew bodyslaming me to get me up so they can open their santa gifts. Good times.
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Merry Christmas friends. I started with polish Christmas tonight. Tomorrow first Christmas at my new house. Duck on the menu.
Funny old year, but cheers fir the laughs, banter and debate this year everybody.
Stay safe, eat heaps, drink more. Regale us with your best backyard cricket moment.
Chur
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Merry Xmas fern-fam!! Have an awesome day and let the Kai and booze flow. If you gotta travel be safe 😊
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Merry Christmas all 2017 turned shit for me on 22/12/16 So glad to pass that anniversary you reprobate and rascals have greatly entertained me as always so for that I genuinely thank you
Xmas is a time for whanau so I'm into day 4 of a non stop bender with mrs dm and my bro and feeling very liverish its only 9 am here and didnt get in until 4 but bubbles already popped off to marina bay sands for lunch then open the (deliberately) crap pressies Cambodia tomorrow
Hope all you fluffybunnies got better than you deserved and are gonna be able to chill
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Well that was fun. Most of the day was very light and strained conversation. To be honest, it was a painful waste of 5 hours of my life.
At the point where Mrs TA's grandfather (the MIL's father) got up to leave, the MIL did too - which set off a chain of events where everyone is asking her why she's leaving, and her snapping back "I DON'T KNOW!"
Which is fair enough, because she fucking doesn't.
Once that settled down, after a cup of tea she announced she wanted to leave, and my brother had to drive as I'd been drinking Fireball, but I rode shotgun because while I'm a prick of a brother, I'm not THAT much of a prick of a brother.
Turned up, unloaded her shit, took her inside of the retirement facility and up in the lift. She started to get weepy and frantic about being bored all the time and when were we coming to visit next and whatever. I didn't even make eye contact, just threw over my shoulder "We'll come when we can but we're back at work this week" and then shut the door behind me.
Fuck that. Not My Problem. Briskly walked to the nurse's station and let them know her shit was coming apart, then ran for the lifts before the silly old cow came out and spotted me.
Got home, started drinking in earnest, and then Mrs TA's phone rings - its the nursing home, and the MIL is trying to get into a taxi. The taxi driver is outside shouting that he "drove all this way and wants his money" - turns out the old duck called a cab to go to her Dad's place where she apparently planned on staying the night - or forever.
Narrator: Nick offered to go over to the nursing home and tell the taxi driver to fuck off, with added headbutts, but that plan was met with disapproval.
Mrs TA, to her eternal credit, and having just put on a fucking awesome Christmas lunch yet again, was very calm and even apologetic to the staff, but they knew what they signed up for. She said that the MIL was not to leave under any circumstances short of a fire.... and fuck even then
MIL has been moved to the security ward and they're doing their best to get her phone away from her. Then Mrs TA got a bit weepy so I handed out Christmas hugs and then started to vacuum the floor.
After some more tears and hugs, things are relatively back to normal.
So I'm betting your Xmas was better than mine.
The good news is dementia patients rarely last longer than about 5-7 years, so this shitshow has a time limit.
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@nta That's a like for the prose, not that your crazy MIL has ruined your Xmas.
The rest of you, I hope it was an enjoyable day, not arse aching hot or spending time in traffic.
A cool change has just come through on the farm. I'm watching the Griswold's Christmas and lightning approaching from the South.