RIP Sean Wainui
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@yeetyaah I've heard rumours, too, and I agree with you. All I'll say is that I feel even more sorry for his wife and children, if it's true.
I hope the media show some respect and keep their distance. This is not "material" for another clickbait story.
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This thread just got a lot sadder, i hate the black dog as it has had a massive impact in my family, you just never know who it is really impacting as some can really hide things outwardly well, even if they are hurting inside. I really feel for that family right now and hope their friends and extended family continue to rally around them as nothing will feel like it is making sense.
If this does prove true, I just hope as mentioned it is treated with respect.
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@snollygoster said in RIP Sean Wainui:
This is no ones business but the family and close friends to be honest. Shame on you for this story Herald.
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The Herald (and I understand other news outlets) were sent multiple screenshots of social media comments/DMs about the cause of death. No doubt there were plenty of other people on here who had heard the rumours too (I'd heard it from 3 different sources).
The media is really in a no win situation on this:
- don't report on the suspected cause of death (they did it the appropriate way by seeking a statement from the coroner) and they get accused of covering up the cause of death
- do report on it and get told it's nobody's business despite multiple people sending them screenshots of people who would be likely to know discussing his suspected suicide.
And frankly, considering the Givealittle page has raised almost $300k, I'd suggest the cause of death is newsworthy. To be very cold (which I can be at times), I wonder if absolutely everyone who donated would have donated if they were aware it wasn't an "accident" per se. Again, I can't begin to understand the battles potentially going on his head but just offering a different perspective.
Waiting to be cancelled in 3... 2... 1...
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@smudge Settle down Dave.
On the givealittle, would people be less likely to give, considering it's for the family, if it was suicide as opposed to an accident? Actually, to answer my own question I assume some would feel that way, not sure of the numbers though.
But yeah, I think the cause of death of a public figure would have to be considered newsworthy.
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@smudge said in RIP Sean Wainui:
The Herald (and I understand other news outlets) were sent multiple screenshots of social media comments/DMs about the cause of death. No doubt there were plenty of other people on here who had heard the rumours too (I'd heard it from 3 different sources).
The media is really in a no win situation on this:
- don't report on the suspected cause of death (they did it the appropriate way by seeking a statement from the coroner) and they get accused of covering up the cause of death
- do report on it and get told it's nobody's business despite multiple people sending them screenshots of people who would be likely to know discussing his suspected suicide.
And frankly, considering the Givealittle page has raised almost $300k, I'd suggest the cause of death is newsworthy. To be very cold (which I can be at times), I wonder if absolutely everyone who donated would have donated if they were aware it wasn't an "accident" per se. Again, I can't begin to understand the battles potentially going on his head but just offering a different perspective.
Waiting to be cancelled in 3... 2... 1...
Fair.
The other thing the Herald could have done, as has been done before given the way the media traditionally reports suicide, is not get into the cause of death side of it and still post links to all the helplines etc.
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@nepia I can't say I've seen many news stories about suspected suicides (with a link to a Givealittle page), but that's partially due to the nature/rules of reporting on suicides in NZ. I'm all for opening up the conversation on mental health so I think it's necessary for the suspected cause of death to be updated, even if people find it distasteful.
Personally I find Givealittle pages a bit icky at the best of times especially when this one was set up by the Chiefs, a pro rugby organisation no less. I see NZRPA put out a statement mourning his passing but where are they in this? I wonder if they've donated/contributed in some capacity.
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@smudge I was assuming the Chiefs set it up for the family, as you don't really want them to have to do it themselves. But yeah, agree on the ickiness of them, but as long as the money goes to benefit kids etc then I think they have a place.
Actually now you mention the lack of stories on suspected suicides then maybe @MN5 is right, and the Herald should have done the usual saying it without saying it that @shark mentioned.
I'm now all over the show with my thoughts on this now, all I know is that it's sad for the family either way.
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@nepia said in RIP Sean Wainui:
@smudge I was assuming the Chiefs set it up for the family, as you don't really want them to have to do it themselves. But yeah, agree on the ickiness of them, but as long as the money goes to benefit kids etc then I think they have a place.
Actually now you mention the lack of stories on suspected suicides then maybe @__MN5__ is right, and the Herald should have done the usual saying it without saying it that @shark mentioned.
I'm now all over the show with my thoughts on this now, all I know is that it's sad for the family either way.
Well you do know what they say about broken clocks
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@nepia said in RIP Sean Wainui:
@smudge I was assuming the Chiefs set it up for the family, as you don't really want them to have to do it themselves. But yeah, agree on the ickiness of them, but as long as the money goes to benefit kids etc then I think they have a place.
Actually now you mention the lack of stories on suspected suicides then maybe @MN5 is right, and the Herald should have done the usual saying it without saying it that @shark mentioned.
I'm now all over the show with my thoughts on this now, all I know is that it's sad for the family either way.
Problem with that approach is it was already reported as a single car crash so it would require some literary gymnastics from the reporter to update the story while slotting in the contact details for support and would leave more questions than answers.
The rules have been relaxed slightly in recent years, in that it can be reported as a suspected suicide but no mention of the manner of the suicide (which is why the Coroner has suppressed further details about the crash).
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My comment about the media showing respect and keeping their distance was not about writing one article to inform their readers about this news. I'm more concerned about some of them going to milk this and publish multiple emotive clickbait stories. If there's real news, okay, publish it if done the proper way. If there's no substantial additional news factor, don't. And don't use screaming headlines or social media posts.
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@stargazer said in RIP Sean Wainui:
My comment about the media showing respect and keeping their distance was not about writing one article to inform their readers about this news. I'm more concerned about some of them going to milk this and publish multiple emotive clickbait stories. If there's real news, okay, publish it if done the proper way. If there's no substantial additional news factor, don't. And don't use screaming headlines or social media posts.
Yep, now that the coroner has made a statement and the tangi was over the weekend, I hope that - as you say - it's not drawn out with angle after angle for the next few weeks. I suspect this preliminary statement by the coroner will probably lead to the media stepping back from the story a little bit anyway.
At least until the Chiefs reconvene...
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I don't know why, but I was touched by a suicide I responded to a few weeks ago. You get jobs that impact you more than others because for some reason you can relate to those affected. It got me thinking.
One thing I do know is that we, as in society, need to be able to talk about suicide. All aspects of it. From the act itself to the effect it has on those left behind. There is a stigma to suicide that is being fuelled by the silence and that stigma damages everyone.
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@booboo suicide likely will impact any insurances his whanau might receive...
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@taniwharugby said in RIP Sean Wainui:
@booboo suicide likely will impact any insurances his whanau might receive...
Used to be 13 month exception clauses back in the day. Is that not the case these days?
NB: the NZR group plan looks to be accident only (plus permanent disability) -
Having experienced more than enough suicides in my life I really do feel for the family. Those in grief can't help but feel guilty and you always wonder if you could have done something earlier to prevent it.
Mental health is a disease that is only really starting to get the recognition it deserves, and one could argue a lack of media in the past is one of the reasons we have been so slow to act.
I did 10 years in the Cops and never once spoke to a mental health professional, even after my boss hung himself and I was on duty when it happened. I was always surprised I had to be tested each year to carry a firearm yet no checks were done on my mental health to use the thing.
All I can hope are cases like this are used in a way to encourage those with the illness to reach out for help.
Rugby star Sean Wainui's death investigated as 'suspected suicide': Coroner
