Dad advice sharing thread.
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On the subject of martial arts has anyone had any experience with that? My boy (nearly 6) is pretty small/skinny so was thinking a martial art would be a great way to improve his confidence while also teaching some discipline. Any recommendations on which is best for young kids? I'd say it needs to be reasonably exciting or he may get bored (think I heard Karate is pretty boring?).
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@No-Quarter I'd say it all comes down to the Instructor and how they engage the kids.
When I was looking at an options for TR Jnr, most allowed him to attend 2 or 3 classes before deciding to join up.
So we went along, the one he joined (Tae Kwon Do) had a number of kids his age and a few others started at the same time, which also helps.
But yeah, the disipline thing is good, also teaches respect, and while they are teaching them to fight, they stress that it is for self defence.
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@No-Quarter Both my girls 11 & 7 do Brazilian JuJitsu, and have been doing it for the last year. They are loving it, it gives them self confidence, strength, self defence and also confidence with grappling with boys.
The youngest one is the more athletic, and she was runner up at a recent tournament, losing to the eventual winner by a close margin. The elder is the gentle one and she had one girl in her class that took a disliking to her (after both being BFF's). The girl (1 belt higher) was being very aggressive in the grappling drills, but I needn't be concerned as Miss DK, stood her ground and was able to defend herself and pull off a few holds and escapes.
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@taniwharugby @dK thanks for that - will check those out. As TR says probably best to try a few and see what he likes. He had some issues with older kids in the playground last year so will definitely get him started soon.
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@No-Quarter also a good way for them to meet other kids, and interact with those of varying ages.
He is mates with a guy 2 years older that is at the High School he is starting at, this guy is a big lad who is a couple of belts higher, so gives him someone at school to look for if he needs helps.
While I am still not sure how he;d react if cornered like he was 2 years ago which prompted us to get him into it, I do know if he did react, he can hit hard!
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@Rembrandt well I think alot of this again comes back to the instructors explaining what they are training for and trying to achieve.
They certainly tell them that actually fighting back is a last resort, and often defending yourself and hitting out at the bully simply a means to removing yourself from the situation, cos often that is the MO of a bully, pick a fight with a kid they dont expect to fight back..if they do, it takes them by surprise, which could give you that opening to run away.
I think it is more the confidence it can gives kids in themselves and how they carry themselves, so they look less like an easy target to a bully, rather than some meek little kid that shuffles from building to building.
That said, I watched the instructor do his 4th Dan black belt, that included some knife attacks, while he is smaller than me and I reckon if I got a clean hit, he wouldnt get up, I am not sure I could lay a hand on him if I wanted to!
I went to school with a guy who was small, and had done a martial art all his life, when he was about 17/18 he had a girlfriend who used to get him into fights cos she knew he would kick some arse for her.
Attitude goes a decent way.
But having your kids doing any activity like this, is better than none!!
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@No-Quarter another vote for BJJ - I have a bunch of mates who are into it and all their kids are on the bandwagon. I think it's awesome for nearly anyone as it's a mix of technique/strength/skill. Which I think @dK summed up quite nicely.
Oh, on another note I know a few friends that have their kids in circus training. That's more around stuff like tumbling and other skill based stuff (ropes, poles, silks etc). But can be a good option if the kids aren't into a martial art etc.
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@taniwharugby said in Dad advice sharing thread.:
@Rembrandt well I think alot of this again comes back to the instructors explaining what they are training for and trying to achieve.
They certainly tell them that actually fighting back is a last resort, and often defending yourself and hitting out at the bully simply a means to removing yourself from the situation, cos often that is the MO of a bully, pick a fight with a kid they dont expect to fight back..if they do, it takes them by surprise, which could give you that opening to run away.
I think it is more the confidence it can gives kids in themselves and how they carry themselves, so they look less like an easy target to a bully, rather than some meek little kid that shuffles from building to building.
That said, I watched the instructor do his 4th Dan black belt, that included some knife attacks, while he is smaller than me and I reckon if I got a clean hit, he wouldnt get up, I am not sure I could lay a hand on him if I wanted to!
I went to school with a guy who was small, and had done a martial art all his life, when he was about 17/18 he had a girlfriend who used to get him into fights cos she knew he would kick some arse for her.
Attitude goes a decent way.
But having your kids doing any activity like this, is better than none!!
Well as a former short skinny kid who got a hard time at school I'd say +1 for the BJJ as well. Other styles rely too much on space and timing which you never get as a kid. If someone grabs you and you can make them let go that's probably all you need.
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@Rembrandt shoulda made bigger friends, that's I done did when got bullied.
Problem is these days is kids are just as likely to pull a knife on you as punch you.
My brother and I were wanting to kick the arses of these 4 local teens in Kerikeri lsst weekend who were hassling some tourists at a swimming hole after they were scoping thier gear out too.
Instead we just stood in between with our angry dad faces...although they likely been ok anyway just dont like thieving smart arse pricks like them.
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@No-Quarter Judo has been the making of my son over the last year.
Thoroughly recommend a martial art for youngsters, the only advice I will give is to watch a couple of classes, and see if there are potentially kids who will disrupts, and if so, how the teacher handles them. When you are looking at a 7-1 ratio (it's 15-2 in my son's class), a couple of non listeners, disruptors can have a real influence, and really destroy the class.
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Thanks guys, much appreciated
@MajorRage very good call. I enrolled him in basketball last year and he got nothing out of it as the class was too big, and the disruptors meant he got basically 0 attention from the coaches. Was a waste of time in the end.
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@JK said in Dad advice sharing thread.:
Need advice re rugby this year for lil red.
The kids 9 going on 10 late this year and one of the smallest kids in his class at school etc. Currently weighs 28kg on the dot which is the cut off point for J5.
Played J6 last year and year before so has done two years tackle now. Not super confident but does very well when gets involved. Good tackling technique and work rate and pretty quick with a good step. Looks like a 10 to me or even a 9 as has a great pass for a kid of his age.
Anyway, he could prob hold his weight fine at 28kg through to 1 May and play J5 (pretty much same as J6 but has drop kick to start game rather than a tap and can fend). J4 goes to full field and pretty much full rugby but still no pushing in scrums I think. J4 weight grade jumps up a bit. He could be up to 38kg for his age (so 10kg heavier than current weight which is a lot at that size). Younger kids up to 50kg!
Anyone elses kid skipped a grade like this? Handle it OK?
He's keen on J4. Most, if not all, of his team from last year will be J5 and I think he would enjoy the season a hell of a lot more in J5.
Update - Well JKjnr has ended up in J5 and just managed to make the weight. Will ensure hes on the mark come round 1 as well for the proper weigh in.
Kinda had to go J5 in the end as J4 used to be full field for North Harbour but they've aligned with rest of the country to only go full field from J3. This meant that all his mates who were going to repeat J4 moved up to J3 as couldn't face going back to half field rugby. I suspect North Harbour J4 comp will be very weak this year.
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@mariner4life said in Dad advice sharing thread.:
I could easily get behind it for kids in their mid-teens, some of them are getting rapid. But younger? come on.
Yes, it's very "back in my day" but i only ever wore a lid at prem club level. Never at high school, and never at any other senior grade. And i could barely hold a bat.
@mariner4life Is correct.
He couldnt bat for shit.
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As for kids wearing helmets.. hell yes!
Not because any kid that age is ever going to bowl a bouncer.. most can bvarely keep it on the pitch and bounce it above knee roll height.
But because nearly every kids fav shot is the cross bat slog to deep square, and a top edge straight into the mouth is a real possibility for the uncoordinated little fuckers.
As fr my boy, he is now playing cricket and seems to like it, he is not really starring because spin bowlers have a disadvantage at that level, but he can now bowl leg breaks consistently and very rarely gets called for a wide , and his wrong un is now bloody mean, more of a off spinner out of the side of the hand, but effective and turns almost as far as his leg break, but just because he is weird he is developing a different wrong un.. because? Fuck knows. Apparently he reckons it is all about variations.
He doesnt really know if his team wins, but he always knows his bowling figures and who dropped catches off his bowling. He isnt much of a team player, which is strange as his dad is such an amicable team player. -
Dont think I mentioned the first game incident but HELMETS are a yes from me too.
Anyway, first game of season and my lads team won toss and chose to bowl first (all shit scared of batting against the hard ball I think).
First bowl of the game/season/hardball career and the most confident of the boys comes firing in and a full toss straight in the batsmens head...BANG! Down he goes. Lot's of 'Oh fuckkkk!!!' from the sidelines but after a few mins he is ok. Bowler told to try 'keep it down'. Next two balls are also full tosses but waste highish so umpire has another chat....'gotta keep it down son otherwise you are off'. Not the best start to season and the young fella bowling is now letting out a few tears.
Ok so 4th ball....this was the closest one of the over to bouncing....gets the batsmen on the toe on the full!! Again the batsmen is down in a heap. This one hurt and no pads there, just a cheap pair of runners...OUCH!!
Batsmen (and bowler) did see out the over and the next two balls were full tosses around knee height so allowed but thank god the kid had the helmet. That first ball could have done some real damage!
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@JK said in Dad advice sharing thread.:
Dont think I mentioned the first game incident but HELMETS are a yes from me too.
Anyway, first game of season and my lads team won toss and chose to bowl first (all shit scared of batting against the hard ball I think).
First bowl of the game/season/hardball career and the most confident of the boys comes firing in and a full toss straight in the batsmens head...BANG! Down he goes. Lot's of 'Oh fuckkkk!!!' from the sidelines but after a few mins he is ok. Bowler told to try 'keep it down'. Next two balls are also full tosses but waste highish so umpire has another chat....'gotta keep it down son otherwise you are off'. Not the best start to season and the young fella bowling is now letting out a few tears.
Ok so 4th ball....this was the closest one of the over to bouncing....gets the batsmen on the toe on the full!! Again hes down in a heap. This one hurt and no pads there, just a cheap pair of runners...OUCH!!
Batsmen (and bowler) did see out the over and the next two balls were full tosses around knee height so allowed but thank god the kid had the helmet. That first ball could have done some real damage!
Aye?
What bloody grade is your kid playing? year 35? Most kids in this area are FAR more likely to bounce it twice than bowl a full toss. The pitch is only 2 paces shorter than a full pitch. -
First year hard ball so year 5 of school.
Some of the kids have pretty good pace and to be honest I wouldn’t want to face them unless padded up.
JKjnr though isn’t one of those kids, just slow to medium but great line and length so gets plenty of wickets
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@JK said in Dad advice sharing thread.:
Some of the kids have pretty good pace and to be honest I wouldn’t want to face them unless padded up.
I've got there too. Won't go into the nets to face without protection ... pace and bounce means if you miss it, the old family jewels could be rearranged.
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I have an 11 year old son. He is probably the most innocent kid at his school. He's well liked by the kids and a teachers dream. He and I have a very close relationship and he is suddenly talking to me about a girl he likes. I asked him if he had told her how he feels and he said no. But then he said "But i guess if I don't do anything about it I won't get anywhere". I liked that he realises this, I say shit like that to him is sports(you miss 100% of the shot you don't take etc..). He's so bloody sensitive Im concerned she'll crush him if its not reciprocated. That's life, it has to happen to grow and I can live with him learning that lesson. But I have absolutely no idea what to do if he ends up with a mrs...
Any tips?
