Veitch is done
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@taniwharugby said in Veitch is done:
@virgil yep, having $$$ to get good legal defence is no doubt another factor for some of these.
Offering to pay for her silence with $100k shows money is no issue for wife beater.
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I took Devlin’s point to roughly be: I’ve heard some of the people celebrating on Twitter to be very matey with Veitchy on the radio (rather than merely ‘professional’), yet the boot went in very quick. Some of his colleagues seemed to run with the hares and then hunt with the hounds when it suited them...
Which is far from a crime, but is enough to make you look twice. Who knows what goes on behind the scenes though...
Biggest issue (one of many) I have with Veitch is that his remorse often appears to be for the impact on him, rather than his former partner....
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@donsteppa said in Veitch is done:
I took Devlin’s point to roughly be: I’ve heard some of the people celebrating on Twitter to be very matey with Veitchy on the radio (rather than merely ‘professional’), yet the boot went in very quick. Some of his colleagues seemed to run with the hares and then hunt with the hounds when it suited them...
Which is far from a crime, but is enough to make you look twice. Who knows what goes on behind the scenes though...
Biggest issue (one of many) I have with Veitch is that his remorse often appears to be for the impact on him, rather than his former partner....
Last year I was working with a guy who I thought was a complete fluffybunny, he bullied the younger guys to the point of tears and backstabbed the top builder at the firm every chance he got. He tried to catch up a couple of times outside of work but I brushed him off , but because I had to work alongside the fuckwit I had to make the pretence of actually not loathing him .
After he quit when the boss turned him down for a wage rise we went and had beers to celebrate. The project manager found out and asked me what I thought of the guy and I said he was the biggest fluffybunny I ever worked with. The project manager got a bit shitty with me for not speaking up and I pointed out that three apprentices and a Carpenter had all independently gone to the boss and said they’d quit if they had to work with him again- one of the apprentices was actually crying after the way he was treated . Because of that there didn’t seem much point if a message as strong as that didn’t change anything.
I’m not sure what Veitchs co workers would have been able to do if they did hate working with him seeing as he was likely the “star” he would have had more sway with management and if you do profess your loathing for your co workers to them it would make for a pretty uncomfortable work environment particularly when they are on air.
Having said that I wouldn’t have taken to social media myself to say those things, NZ is a small place and I’m sure a few people would have taken note of the behaviour. Would definitely have toasted the odious fuckwits departure down at the pub though. -
Having said that I wouldn’t have taken to social media myself to say those things, NZ is a small place and I’m sure a few people would have taken note of the behaviour. Would definitely have toasted the odious fuckwits departure down at the pub though.
Sums it up nicely all round!
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If you talk to any first response police veteran there is a good chance that veteran will tell you the face of DV is not the one that is portrayed in the media. I am talking about first reponse coppers here, not the coppers that are desk bound 'experts' who deal with the aggrieved after the fact.
As a veteran I can tell you, in 14 years of being the first reponder to DV incidents, I can count on one hand the number of incidents I have been to where the female has been the victim as portrayed in the media. The vast majority of DV incidents involve the female giving as good as she gets, one way or another.
I could go on and on but I won't. In short, DV will never be dealt with adequately while women are seen and treated as the victims and men as the abusers.
Someone in the thread earlier said something like surely if the facts of Veitch's case were as reported in the media he would have done time. I tend to agree. I would bet my house on the fact there is more to it than what we know.
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@taniwharugby said in Veitch is done:
I think the impact on someones career is always taken into account, regardless of sporting or not, not just NZ.
People who don't think career should be taken into account have no idea how the law works in practice. Heaps of people every year get discharges on drink driving related offences.
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@crazy-horse said in Veitch is done:
If you talk to any first response police veteran there is a good chance that veteran will tell you the face of DV is not the one that is portrayed in the media. I am talking about first reponse coppers here, not the coppers that are desk bound 'experts' who deal with the aggrieved after the fact.
As a veteran I can tell you, in 14 years of being the first reponder to DV incidents, I can count on one hand the number of incidents I have been to where the female has been the victim as portrayed in the media. The vast majority of DV incidents involve the female giving as good as she gets, one way or another.
I could go on and on but I won't. In short, DV will never be dealt with adequately while women are seen and treated as the victims and men as the abusers.
Someone in the thread earlier said something like surely if the facts of Veitch's case were as reported in the media he would have done time. I tend to agree. I would bet my house on the fact there is more to it than what we know.
Regardless of all that, one person had broken bones and the other did not. That's just a fact. There are definitely some women who instigate violence, there are probably some women who even like it.
The point is it is completely unfair to drag Dunn-Powell's name through the mud and make aspersions about her based on what Veitch did. As an abuse victim, it would be tough to read something like that.
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@hydro11 didn't realise I was dragging her name through the mud. I was more or less generalizing. There will be more to it, one way or the other, than we as the public know. If I have learnt one thing over the years it is that the only people who know what really happened are the two involved.
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@crazy-horse said in Veitch is done:
If you talk to any first response police veteran there is a good chance that veteran will tell you the face of DV is not the one that is portrayed in the media. I am talking about first reponse coppers here, not the coppers that are desk bound 'experts' who deal with the aggrieved after the fact.
As a veteran I can tell you, in 14 years of being the first reponder to DV incidents, I can count on one hand the number of incidents I have been to where the female has been the victim as portrayed in the media. The vast majority of DV incidents involve the female giving as good as she gets, one way or another.
I could go on and on but I won't. In short, DV will never be dealt with adequately while women are seen and treated as the victims and men as the abusers.
Someone in the thread earlier said something like surely if the facts of Veitch's case were as reported in the media he would have done time. I tend to agree. I would bet my house on the fact there is more to it than what we know.
My old lady is a social worker with the exact same argument, the bias against men is beyond overwhelming (and I'm not saying this is the case for veitch whom I think is a knob jockey of the highest order). I've been in a very bad relationship myself and have heard some absolute horror stories from the guys perspective. Violence is by no means gendered.
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Firstly, Veitch is a FW.
But responding to the current discussion, as someone who has had an abusive partner, I can only say that I had to constantly remember not to return fire because I knew I’d get dragged off (and kicked out of the country).
Ridiculously, it took me quite some time to realize that the behavior was a pattern and that it wouldn’t change.
Luckily, I also knew that my actions reflected my choices. For that reason, regardless of the circumstances, she would have to be armed for me to fire away, and for that I can’t really see clear to give Veitch any room here.
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@gt12 said in Veitch is done:
Firstly, Veitch is a FW.
But responding to the current discussion, as someone who has had an abusive partner, I can only say that I had to constantly remember not to return fire because I knew I’d get dragged off (and kicked out of the country).
Ridiculously, it took me quite some time to realize that the behavior was a pattern and that it wouldn’t change.
Luckily, I also knew that my actions reflected my choices. For that reason, regardless of the circumstances, she would have to be armed for me to fire away, and for that I can’t really see clear to give Veitch any room here.
I too had an abusive partner years ago. I was a young fella a long way from home and I had no idea how to cope. I was never physically hurt, but fuck me the emotional shit was out of this world. This girl made me the angriest I have ever been in my life. She knew the buttons to push and she wouldn't let go. I would often cop it for something as trivial as walking into a room with a smile on my face. I would try to walk away from her but she would follow and keep going at me. I found out during that relationship that I would never hit a woman because if I was capable of it I surely have belted her. The relationship ended for other unrelated reasons, but I still wonder what would have happened if we stayed together longer.
She told me her last partner threatened and attacked her with a knife and I started to understand why as our relationship progressed. She did me a favour in the long run, my Crazy Lady Radar is finely tuned. Trust me, it's all in their eyes and their hair if you know what to look for.
My experience is so common. Every day I go to DVs where the female says one thing and the male says another thing, or doesn't say anything at all. I have lost count of the times I have been told by the male that he and she had been arguing and she would not let it go. He has tried walking away but she has followed him and said something that made him snap. "You'll never get to see the kids!" is common. He punches a hole in the wall, or gives her a push, and suddenly we turn up and we are dragging him away.
These things build, the frustrations grow and tolerance levels drop over time. A bit like Chinese water torture I suppose. One drop seems trivial but when you are exposed to a drop over and over again sooner or later you are going to lose it.
In Queensland the law is set up to view the female as the victim. As first response officers we are trained to determine who is 'most in need of protection'. And guess who is usually deemed as 'most in need of protection'? Yep, the female. All through our training the aggrieved (victim) is the female and the respondent (abuser) is the male. As males in these training sessions we speak up but we are talked down by the desk bound females running the course. On the plus side, female colleagues are starting to speak up as well, but they too are talked down by the facilitators.
Every DV we go to we are obliged to record the details on the computer system and we have to designate an aggrieved and a respondent. Most of the time we have conflicting versions. Earlier I said we are trained to view things as who is 'most in need of protection'. Parity disparity in terms of strength is most often used as a way of determining 'most in need of protection', so given the male is almost always stronger than the female the male is recorded as the respondent.
Policy makers, law makers and other stake holders use police statistics to further the agenda they are pushing. If the stats are not accurately recording what is actually happening between couples how can the policies and laws be effective?
We have many support agencies we can refer females of DV to. Support agencies for men? Yes there are one or two. But they are set up first and foremost to deal with males as the respondent, to help the male deal with his anger issues and violence. There is bugger all help out there for male victims. If you are a male, and you are getting abused, you are all but on your own.
I can’t help but wonder how many male suicides, how many family tragedies where the male kills himself and the kids, and how many murders of wives/partners are the result of DV where the female has been a psychological abuser and the male had nowhere to go for help, nowhere to go where he would be listened to and taken seriously.
I said in an earlier post that I could go on. I guess I just did and there is plenty more that I could ramble on about. This subject is close to my heart. I have been on the receiving end of DV and I have investigated DV. I am frustrated as hell because as a society we are getting it wrong, and while we are getting it wrong people are suffering.
It sucks that I feel I have to say this last bit, but…What I wrote above is not meant to be a reference to the Veitch case.
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@crazy-horse great post .
I remember seeing some people online mocking Ross Kemp for getting beaten by his partner. I’m not sure what you’re supposed to do in that situation other than either get out or take a bit of a hiding.
A mate of mine had a mrs that was violent occasionally and he said he just used to lock himself in the toilet till she calmed down if he was unable to get out of the house. The neighbors called the cops one time and took him away in the police car , they were honest enough to tell him they couldn’t figure out who was telling the truth and thought getting one of them out of there for the night was the best option.
Fortunately they’ve split now .