Grumpy Old Man
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Victor Meldrew Gets Insurance For His New Car. Sets New High on Grumpiness Scale
(This is a shortened, but pretty much verbatim account of this morning's events. Sorry for the length - just had to vent this out of my system)
Buying a new car and getting insurance. Go to existing insurers website (Let’s call them Indirect Sqiggle) and get a quote for new car. Pretty good price at £220. Current insurance is £285. Ring Insurer to arrange a changeover and refund:
“I’d like to swap my car over on my policy”
“OK Sir, that’s no problem, there will be an additional premium of £38.56”
“But that makes the cost of insuring my new car £323.56, when I have a quote from you of £220. Is that right?”
“That’s the full year policy cost, sir, but let me see if I can give you a discount”
Wait 7m minutes. Thank fuck there’s no background muzak. Fire up Candy Crush
“Thank you for waiting, sir. I am pleased we can offer you a discount on the £323.56 price. The new price will be £319.56, a saving of £4.00. Would you like me to go ahead on that basis”?
“No, can you explain why I’m being charged a 33% more for swapping my car instead of buying a new policy?”
“I don’t know sir. Please bear with me while I find out”
5 minutes and 2 Candy Crush levels later
“Hello, my name is Dwayne. I hear you have some questions on your premium”
“Yes, can you explain why I’m being charged a 33% more for swapping my car instead of just buying a new policy?”
“I don’t know sir. Please bear with me while I find out”
Close down Candy Crush. Start googling "Anger Management"
“OK sir, we can’t do anything this year but can offer you a big discount next year”
“What level of discount?”
“I don’t know sir. Please bear with me while I find out”
Changes google search to "Medieval Torture and Insurance Agents"
“Hello sir? I can’t guarantee it, but the discount will be around £4-6”
“This is a bit silly. Perhaps I should cancel my policy and just but the new one at £220. Is there a cost to cancelling the existing policy”
“I don’t know sir. Please bear with me while I find out”
“Hello, sir? We will refund your £285 premium minus £35 for the 3 months the policy has run”
Do the maths and realise I’m either dealing with an innumerate cretin or a broken CRM system
“OK, that’s great. Can you just confirm those figures as they don’t sound right to me”
“They are correct sir. You will get a refund of £250”
“OK thanks for confirming, Bye”
Victor buys new policy for new car and basks in the knowledge he’s effectively got 2 months free car insurance on the old car.
20 minutes later..
“Hello this is Indirect Sqiggle. We may have given you wrong information on your refund. The actual refund will be £166”
“Why”
“We gave you the wrong information”
“Well, I’ve just bought another policy from you based on inaccurate information provided by you. Is that correct?”
“Yes sir”
“So what are you going to do about it.”
“I don’t know sir. Please bear with me while I find out....”
"No, don't bother, just don't bother. Any more of this and I'll go bonkers"
I hung up at that point as I was between terminal frustration and going into serious Victor Meldrew mode. But this could run and run..
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@victor-meldrew You have just raised an issue that I have wondered about for a while. When they say that this call may be recorded (for training, yeah right, or to see how pissed off they can make their customers) are they still recording when I am on hold?
The recording would be an abject lesson in use the of expletives, threats and profanities. The training value in that must be immense.
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@snowy said in Grumpy Old Man:
Oh, and forget anger management. It doesn't work, we are all living proof.
Glad you noticed my irony..
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@snowy said in Grumpy Old Man:
@victor-meldrew You have just raised an issue that I have wondered about for a while. When they say that this call may be recorded (for training, yeah right, or to see how pissed off they can make their customers) are they still recording when I am on hold?
The recording would be an abject lesson in use the of expletives, threats and profanities. The training value in that must be immense.
Dunno. Good point.
You were able to get a transcript of any recorded interaction at one stage under data protection rules. An evil idea is forming. 😈
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@kiwiwomble said in Grumpy Old Man:
Maybe not super agro but bloody unhappy
fuck i can feel the sense of entitlement oozing through the monitor
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@mariner4life said in Grumpy Old Man:
fuck i can feel the sense of entitlement oozing through the monitor
Can't see much of anything in my monitor now. I punched her in the face 5 times and monitor not working so well now. Not a fan of violence against women (broad description in this case) but some virtual punches to an annoying bitch is fine right?
I think that you have a unanimous answer @Kiwiwomble from all of us.
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@mn5 said in Grumpy Old Man:
@kiwiwomble said in Grumpy Old Man:
Maybe not super agro but bloody unhappy
Skinny, potentially bad teeth, clearly on meth.
And the woman owner too.
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@mn5 said in Grumpy Old Man:
From the YouTube thread…….
Videos in portrait mode. So fucken irritating.
This should be taught in schools. It's effectively future-proofing our viewing of future events of public interest / grandstand brawls at sporting events etc.
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@victor-meldrew said in Grumpy Old Man:
@snowy said in Grumpy Old Man:
@victor-meldrew You have just raised an issue that I have wondered about for a while. When they say that this call may be recorded (for training, yeah right, or to see how pissed off they can make their customers) are they still recording when I am on hold?
The recording would be an abject lesson in use the of expletives, threats and profanities. The training value in that must be immense.
Dunno. Good point.
You were able to get a transcript of any recorded interaction at one stage under data protection rules. An evil idea is forming. 😈
I've wondered about that for a while... can you request a copy?
I know that most companies have "policies" which adhere to certain data-retention ideals... not sure which territories these translate into laws.
But I have to watch a goddamn training video every 6 months or a year, telling me the same shit all over again. And I suspect that in the EU, at least, these are based on laws...- All data collected needs to be relevant, and only used for the purposes agreed to by the customer/public-member
- Upon request - any customer/public-member - must be able to look at the data you've got on them
- Upon request - any customer/public-member - must be able to request a timely deletion or update of the data you've got on them.
So... yeah - you could have some fun with that.
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@snowy said in Grumpy Old Man:
@victor-meldrew You have just raised an issue that I have wondered about for a while. When they say that this call may be recorded (for training, yeah right, or to see how pissed off they can make their customers) are they still recording when I am on hold?
The recording would be an abject lesson in use the of expletives, threats and profanities. The training value in that must be immense.
& @victor-meldrew
Yes you are still recorded whilst on hold, its the most entertaining part when reviewing calls for complaints from patients. Usually lots of singing, shouting at kids and spouses... Our recording system kicks in the moment you reach our queue, for data on call wait times etc
Also worth noting that if you ever speak to a GP for a phone consultation that is recorded too, so remember that if you ever have any reason to complain about your care.Re data protection, under GDPR we have to state on our phones that calls are recorded and inform patient's that they can opt out of this by informing the Receptionist who will pause the recording. Everything belongs to you if it involves you, so you can request copies of your records etc.
The NHS app and local online patient access systems have really helped with that though. -
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@snowy said in Grumpy Old Man:
@r-l said in Grumpy Old Man:
Yes you are still recorded whilst on hold,
Oh shit.
Yup, thought so.
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@r-l said in Grumpy Old Man:
@snowy said in Grumpy Old Man:
@r-l said in Grumpy Old Man:
Yes you are still recorded whilst on hold,
Oh shit.
Yup, thought so.
Explains why my bank isn't quite as happy to hear from me these days...
And the phone company.
And the internet company
And the credit card company
And the power companyJust, oh shit.
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@r-l said in Grumpy Old Man:
whip out your best stuff
I'm not sure if that means what I thought meant...